Last weekend, I officially moved back to my mom’s after a long long time.
Packing started about a month ago. Cartons upon cartons of clothes, random stuff, bags, shoes and more clothes, a piece of furniture– that was all I brought to (or back?) mom’s. This was a hard decision that kept getting delayed, mainly because of me. It wasn’t easy, to say goodbye to a place I grew up in.
I was taken care of and brought up in my early years by my late grandma when mom and dad were at work (I think they were workaholics.) I knew every nook and cranny, every scent, every old crack in that old house. there were no renovation, hardly any new paintwork. But it was the most comfortable for me and for my sister for sure although she was mostly at my mom’s.
My grandfather made the decision to sell the flat he shared with my late grandmother. Decision… he took his time, well.. my fault because I didn’t want to be displaced so soon after she left us. I think I have gotten over it. Much of it. But I do find myself being brought back to memories of her. A few nights ago, I pulled my calf muscle in my sleep (yes how it happened? beats me. I’m a loser even in my sleep!) and my instant reaction had always been to call out for her. i didn’t of course but I half anticipated that she was there to tend to me. sigh grandma, your love was perfect.
When we finally got a buyer, I knew it was the end (!!). Coincidentally my sister’s wedding is also around the corner and I guess all of us made the quick decision for what’s to come.
My sister’s tying the knot with her long time love of a lifetime (lol) I’m happy for her but I am sad that I will be spending less time with her after she moves out and on with her new life. We were close growing up and she is one of the few people who shares my sense of humour. I will not miss the fights though!
I always pray for her happiness and that God eases her into her new life quickly and with grace. it’s also quite a learning point for me since I’m not getting hitched first heh. Also, I am super emotional and my eyes are like stupid emo girls — I cry so much that I am embarrassed when I cry at weddings/in the movies/watching sappy youtube vids. Please God, make me super busy on Sunday so I don’t feel sad to see my sister be married (in a happy way of course!) More about the wedding soon!
settling in and settling down
So here I am writing in my new bed in my new room (totally inspired by Square Rooms magazine!) I’m loving it so far… still need to decorate this space more and make it my home, fast. I still cringe at the thought of not going back to my grandparent’s place.. still cringe at the thought of not walking down that narrow corridor to the second last unit on the 8th floor.
Now I press 7.